THE DAMNED UNITED. Movies with damn in the title — they’re a small but blasphemous bunch. You got your damn musicals (Damn Yankees), you got your damn historical adventures (Damn the Defiant!), and you got your damn horror flicks (Village of the Damned, Queen of the Damned). Now, add to the list: The Damned United. And, no, it’s not a movie about a bunch of airline passengers stuck on the tarmac for three hours.
Michael Sheen plays an English soccer coach who takes a winning team from first to last place. It’s sort of like The Natural, except with soccer, and not only do they lose the big game, they never even make it to it. Hey, happy endings are overrated. Anyway, this is a damn good story about the loss of loyalty and friendship. I’m in!
COLLEGE ROAD TRIP. It’s hard to believe Martin Lawrence is still making movies. What’s up with that? And holy mackerel, Raven-Symone sure has developed a nice set of built-in flotation devices. She could do PSAs for aquatic safety. Unfortunately, they’re not enough to keep this dud of a movie afloat. It isn’t funny! It’s nonsensical! And last but not least, it’s stupid! The best thing about this movie is the bug-eyed pig. What else can I say? I’m out!
BATTLE IN SEATTLE. I originally rented this movie thinking it was a documentary about wrestling. Maybe a Freddie Blassie vs Mil Mascaras sort of a thing. But it’s actually a not-too-bad movie about violent protest at the World Trade Organization meeting in 1999.
Don’t be a pencil-neck geek — check it out! I’m in!